You Are At The Archives for August 2011

11 August 2011 in

Thanks....BUT no thanks

AUGUST 11, 2011

So, speed dating. It’s like looking forward to a meal at a restaurant you’ve never been to and then getting food poisoning. It can be easily said that it was not my thing. I mean it wasn’t absolutely horrible, but I will not be doing it again. 

It definitely pushed me out of my comfort zone, which is not a bad thing but I didn’t like the obligation of having to talk to people I didn’t want to talk to.  Sure there were a couple of times when the conversation was easy and genuine, but most times it was just fake and awkward. I’ve spent a number of years in sales so I've gotten good at knowing the difference.

I realized I was part of a cliche when a guy actually started talking about how much money he made. I mean, in that short of an amount of time if the only thing you have to fall back on is your bank account, we have nothing in common. I am perfectly capable of earning a pay cheque and if there is nothing to you past your salary, I'm just not interested.

I don’t want to entirely bash the event. It does get you out there and makes you interact with people you would have probably not met otherwise. I'm sure it works for some; I am not one of them. At least now I know that from firsthand experience.

the outspoken introvert

08 August 2011 in

Well, why not?

AUGUST 8, 2011
Anyone who knows me, knows that I don't deal with awkward well. As soon as a situation heads in that direction I bail. This might be part of the reason why dating has not really been my thing. I'm not talking about the first stages of dating which are awesome; looking forward to a text, the kiss, the butterflies, the laughs and the late night conversations. I'm talking about the awkward parts of dating, no chemistry, terrible jokes, unwanted personal questions, or even worse awkward silence. 

These parts pretty much come with instructional videos nowadays. Every news stand has at least one magazine bursting with tips on the do's and don'ts. There have been countless books written on the subject. I mean clearly in order to be able to date successfully one must be educated in this tough to crack social interaction. It seems that saying or doing one little thing wrong leads to complete disaster. Oh and if you wear the wrong outfit you might as well have stayed at home. If your shirt is cut to low you're slutty but if it's not low enough you're a prude. So pick up a Cosmopolitan and some measuring tape to really nail that perfect cleavage. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't show up to a first date in my pajamas. Looking good and put together nicely is important, because it makes you feel more confident; but I wouldn't spend hours in front of the mirror. Even writing about it is exhausting, but that's just me and I've always been terrible at following directions.

All of the relationships I've had, have always come from casual hanging out and co-incidental encounters. The no pressure sort of thing. I'm pretty sure I wore a hoodie half the time. No blind  dates, random set ups or awkward dinners for this gal. Like I said I stay away from awkward. It's not that I'm socially awkward, to the contrary actually, I'm outgoing and can hold up my end of pretty much any conversation. However I'm also blunt, stubborn, and opinionated, sprinkled with my charmingly sarcastic sense of humor. Oh yea and  I have an itsy bitsy tendency to say the wrong thing at the wrong time, kind of - a lot of the time. 

This is why going speed dating tomorrow night is quite out of the ordinary for me to say the least. 25 people, 7 minutes per person. 7 minutes with someone you don't want to talk to can basically seem like 7 hours. But I'm going to step out of my element and see how it goes. There is a very good possibility that I will dread every second of it. Being bombarded with personal questions by a bunch of strangers is not my idea of a good time by any stretch of the imagination. BUT, on the flip side of things it could actually be fun. So I'm going to stick with that until proven wrong by actual events. The venue is great and I'm going with my best friend, if anything it will be good for a laugh. Plus meeting new people, if they're awesome, is always a good thing. Right?

the outspoken introvert

04 August 2011 in

A Little Game of "IF"

AUGUST 4, 2011

Q: If you could change one thing in the world right now, what would you alter?
A: The human pursuit of more, also known as greed.

Q: If you could permanently alter one thing about your physical appearance, what would you change?
A: My un-proportionately  big toe, yea a huge thanks to my mom on that one. Good thing she passed on her awesomely blue eyes to make up for it.

Q: If you could have stopped ageing at any point in your life up to the present, how old would you want to remain?
A: At this point, 25. That was an awesome age! I was old enough to be taken seriously but young enough to make mistakes and not be judged for them.

Q: If you could have personally witnessed one event in history, what would you want to have seen?
A: This is a tough one. I would have loved to see the fall of the Berlin wall. It was a world changing event which was driven by change and the desire for things to be better.

Q: If you could be guaranteed one thing in life besides money, what would you ask for?
A: LOVE! The world does not turn without it, ok technically it does but without love what’s the point?

Q: If you could have been the author of any single book already written, which book would you want to have penned?
A: Hands down, “Gone with the Wind”! Scarlett O"Hara was my idol and Rhett Butler was oh so dreamy. What a pair.

Q: If you were to have your friends, in private, attribute a single quality to you, what would you want it to be?
A: Loyalty.

Q: If you could be the current world champion in any sport, which sport would it be?
A: Figure skating, my career in this particular sport was short lived – because well, I sucked.

Q: If you could eliminate one habit you have, what would you stop doing?
A: I would without a doubt quit smoking. Thus far the only thing I have successfully quit, is quitting.

Q: If you had to describe your idea of a perfect mate, how would you do it?
A: I’m sure that I could come up with some elaborate lovey-dovey way to answer this question. But in all honesty the answer is plain and simple. He could not be perfect, because I would never be able to keep up. However if he gets my jokes and is able to love me when I least deserve it, then he’s perfect for me.

You're more then welcome to play along, answer any of the above questions in the comments section or copy and paste the whole thing to your blog. Whatever suits you best.

the outspoken introvert

03 August 2011 in

Random Ramblings...

AUGUST 3, 2011

My little sister got married recently. The day was filled with love and laughter. It was full of style, sunshine, happy tears and since it was a Polish wedding there was no shortage of booze.  This particular day not only pulled at my heart strings but got me thinking. Leave it to a wedding hey! To bring forth ideas which you are more than happy to leave in the back of your mind on most other occasions. What follows is a random gathering of those ideas, not listed in any particular order.

It is almost impossible to achieve happiness through perfection.
Although I realize this I am still guilty of shooting for "perfect" from time to time. I have gotten better with age because I realize that perfection is boring, perfection is stressful, and perfection never turns out as good as I'd hoped. Happiness is found in those unexpected, unplanned breathtaking moments when you can really let go. Trying to hold on and control everything, all the time, is exhausting. Plus when you're that wound up how can you pay attention to the amazing things which are right in front of you? As far as I'm concerned you can't, most of us are not that great at multitasking. I said it is ALMOST impossible to achieve happiness through perfection because some people seem to pull it off. In my opinion they fit into two categories, liars and robots.

"Why?" Has super awesomely magical powers.  
I have preached questioning the things that surround us many times. I believe it is an integral part of our development. I believe it is equally important to question ourselves, question our actions. This is where the magical power of the "why?" resides. Asking why we're doing something leads to a better understanding of our behavior and what motivates us to action. On the flip side of that coin rests "why not?" another important question one has to ask. Trust me when I say that everybody is their own worst critic and harshest judge. This kind of self-questioning makes us assess our behavior based on advantageous and disadvantageous actions and simply put might prevent us from doing something utterly stupid. This of course is not full proof. 

Happiness is not for the weak! Do you have the balls to do it?
Everyone strives to be happy, but it has been my observation that not everyone can handle it. This is because there is HUGE risk in happiness. In order to be happy you have to venture into the unknown. You have to take chances on things which could potentially hurt you, or another person. This kind of thought process creates fear and self-doubt. We let that fear stifle our potential for happiness. We let it keep us in a little box because that appears to be more comfortable.

It takes balls to go after the things that make you happy. We have a tendency to live our lives in the future. Wrecking possibilities before they have even had a chance to arrive. This especially applies to marriage. People are either willing to take a chance on it or they are petrified of it. Those who are scared justify their fear with the possibility of an eventual break up. What we forget is that you can't live a lifetime in a day. However if what you're doing makes you happy today and it makes you look forward to tomorrow then keep doing what you're doing. Because today, leads to tomorrow, which leads to a week and a month and that's how you eventually create a lifetime. 

the outspoken introvert

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